Texas

Don't mess with Texas. Unless they secede, then bomb the **** out of them.

Great way to kill three birds with one stone (I wish I could claim credit for this idea, but alas, I did not come up with this): Give Texas to China. This would settle our massive debt with China. It would eliminate the throbbing headache that stupid Texans cause the rest of the country. It would take care of illegal immigration, because China doesn't mess around with that kind of stuff.

You should run for office.